Tuesday, 23 September 2008

Thursday, 18 September 2008

Penguins Taking Over the World

As I am uninspired I shall blame the "muse" or the lack of muses around me.

Recollecting to yesterday's post, I told myself that I'd blog before i slept - after karate. Thing was after dinner I kinda felt so tired that I was sleeping before 11.30pm. Late? Actually not. My usual daily sleep patterns, let's say after I got into holiday mode when my IGCSEs finished, I started sleeping at 4 am. So that's like 5 hours earlier than expected. Okay this is boring me. since when has discussing sleeping patterns become interesting renz?

What's new
I'm invited to Maurie's debut tomorrow. Provided that I do not have certain members of her entourage savagely tear me to pieces for my presence there. I should be delighted to accept the invitation. It's more of a first for me (too bad I don't own a tux)... I guess that designer suit I have will do. Haha.

My cockiness gets the best of me again. Well I often wonder if my cockiness is actually a good thing, if I wasn't I'd probably have people scrambling all over taking advantage of me.

To think of it, it has gotten me into lots of trouble already, with a variety of people hating my guts for reasons still mysterious to me. Mysterious to me, its the cockiness remember?

*slapshead*

Oh great I'm talking to myself in my blog ><

They say its great therapy talking to yourself. O_O




I'm not in the mood to continue so I might as well end this and read or something...

PS
Blame amira for the lame title d:

Wednesday, 17 September 2008

I love brunettes ... <3

I don't really feel inspired right now. Though it's becoming a common (and not to mention cliché >.<) practice nowadays to blame the "muse", we all blame it time after time probably for our own comic relief. (We could also speculate that the ordinary human always blames someone or something other than him/herself, which leads me to think of what the "muse" really is. According to the widely acclaimed and renowned... Wikipedia haha. The "muses" are a sisterhood of goddesses or spirits. They originated from Greek mythology. To think of it, when we blame the muse, responsible for the inspiration for; lets say the art of writing, we are actually blaming a "personified concept". Funny to think of it that way, don't you think? Another churning thought: words like "amuse" originate from muse. In a way we've incorporated "personified concepts" into our vocabulary, and when we can't write or if we feel uninspired again we blame "personified concepts")

Right now I'm actually a bit in a hurry with this entry, I'm going to leave in approximately 23 minutes haha. I always make it a point to be one of the earliest in the dojo. Okay enough of that.

Things I did today; hmm quite a bit actually woke up with a bare 3 hours of sleep i think, accompanied Mom to the hospital to get her medicines. Read a bit on Alexander the Great today, I guess when I get back home today, I'll be reading more on him. I've developed this urge to complete studies on major events and world players in history. I've always loved the subject. I could reminisce back to those days, studying the Greeks and Archimedes in was it Year 4?
I just never enjoyed the French Revolution and Bahrain history all that much haha. Oh yes it feels like a chore most of the time but at least I could pass some time studying and doing something productive couldn't I?

But is learning about the what happened before, in line with the belief that one should live in the oppurtunities of the future rather than the mistakes of the past.

As Wafi Al-Zawad (a good friend of mine) once shared with me:
"Instead of focusing on the mistakes of the past, live for the oppurtunities of the future" <-- to the same power not exactly word-for-word in acuracy but sufficient.

Oh yes, whilst reading Katie's blog, i was quoted by her. That's a first, feels really good to be quoted. Which leads me to the last mumbling of my mind I will deal with before I go to Karate. It's a message to Naj...

"Unrequited is undoubtedly a good piece of work hun, and you should be proud that you've been recieving a lot of positive feedback lately. Though I've only managed to read half of it, I still commend it as a good piece of work. I think that I won't be the only one to agree that we want you to continue it. Its nice that you're artistry isn't only visual based as it also extends to writing. Be proud of you're work, God gave you your talents, to the utmost best we should improve them and then use them for His glory."

Guys don't you think that Naj should continue "Unrequited"?

Oh well people I'm going to bounce, I'll be back tonight

Btw I love brunettes...
just saying haha

Friday, 12 September 2008

I Don't Believe in Fairytales Anymore

listening to: maybe - secondhand serenade

I'm probably running on limited time here in Bahrain and can't afford to waste any of it any longer, though I'm resistant to even the thought of leaving, I have a feeling that I really have to. I could come back, but I still don't know if that's really an option now.

I was supposed to write a really long "paper entry" today but I've lost the mood, but for this morning and the following morning tomorrow; I'll be planning the rest of the days. Plus a routine of getting up at 8am to get more things done.

I have so many things to do, that I've simply disregarded so many things that I'm supposed to be doing, but not anymore. That changes from today onwards.

I think if I start thinking again, my brain might pop. I think that isn't a good idea if I'm planning to take college. Haha

Well I've finally found a grant that I could apply for and guess what? It's from Princeton, the institution that Dr. Peter suggested. I am anxious. Who doesn't want to get into Princeton? But what are the chances of me getting in and studying for free... another factor to consider is the fact that I'm a foreign/international student.

...

I think, I'm letting go slowly. I don't want to think about it anymore probably I will, later on today. I'm going to get rid of my baggage, maybe its the realization that fairytales are none existant in real life. I think I've fallen, but the best thing about falling is that you can get up again and smile. Maybe I want things to get fixed maybe be friends and probably just stay that way. Its less awkward that way more convenient and practical.



"And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place"
Maybe - Secondhand Serenade

Saturday, 6 September 2008

"When you were small..."

I still remember those words my dad said on Thursday, as we passed those "kiddie rides" after we picked a few things up at Al-Jazira's in Budaiya. I actually miss those helicopters that take u up and down for like a minute and a half. They used to have them at that supermarket that doesn't exist anymore down in Gudaibiya. Oh memories, though I'm not in the mood for a recollection right now. I miss those Tetra-Pak juice cartons and nibbling on the straws haha wait... I thought you weren't in the mood for a recollection Renz haha.

I feel at ease, I love this mood everything feels so calm... you can just relax and enjoy anything that you feel like doing. I'm going to spend these two weeks reading and probably studying history. I'm quite up for it, I wonder why you don't really get in-depth analysis on 1900's history in school. I mean isn't that more interesting than the topics they give nowadays. I know you have to know the history of the country that you're living in, but how come the focus on that particular history seems to be so important. I mean how will students respond to someone talking about the "cold war" and "communism".

*sighs*

I also need to read on those topics in depth, I enjoyed doing modern history with Mrs. Zahra back in Year 9. That was way more entertaining than memorizing when the first aeroplane landed on this island or the location of the first oil well.

I'm getting extremely dramatic now.

Oh joy there's a correlation between my introduction and the other paragraphs, it's all about the past...

Karate was fun today, I learnt Kata 4 and a bit of 5... they were sparring but I wasn't allowed in since I was a beginner.

Oh well maybe next week, or the week after.

I'm getting bored. Ill write the list on what to research on in a bit.

Signing off.

Wednesday, 3 September 2008

Inspiration

Yesterday at around 6pm I felt inspired to write a blog entry, but i sorta decided to leave it till the night. Unsurprisingly I forgot to, during the night. I developed a splitting headache, and a messy thought process. As usual I believed that sleep would cure me, but sleep didn't come at that time yet, I watched a movie: Drillbit Taylor. The usual story and expectations - crook becomes good in the end, and everyone gets the girl. I sometimes wonder the only book where I didn't quite expect what I was expecting was Dickens' Great Expectations. A great book that I should get ahold of one of these days. I did it in Year 8 and I liked it alot, we did it indepth with Mrs. Khalaf.

Okay, I was reading Katie's blog yesterday. As usual I'm impressed with the quality and her knack for writing. When she blogs it appears to be a scrapbook at somepoints and at most points she just lets her ideas roll onto the screen. Some would disagree that letting your ideas flow and take a course of their own as you write them down (or blog em haha) seems to remove the order in writing, but I say otherwise that's where the therapy begins. Just letting everything inside you flow. Well that's what i noticed with the some people's blogs, notably Katie's and Naj's. Hmm now this entry is starting to sound like I'm copying other people haha.

I've got Karate today, and I'm out of focus I tend to confuse things with one another. I need to concentrate or else I'll get everything wrong. I just have to remember one thing: "keep everything simple". Plus separate things from each other and don't get worried. DON'T GET WORRIED RENZ. I ain't worried about it, I'm worried that I'll get confused. That's like fearing fear.

Cliché
Reminds me of the cliché batttle i had yesterday with Katie. everything we talked about seemed to be cliché, and that every word we spoke of was cliché, and cliché itself has become cliché since everyone uses it often too frequently it must be cliché by now. Even having this paragraph about word battles must be cliché in itself if you think about it. (I'm starving I'll come back to this) (I'm back oh look it's the next day already i started this post 3ish pm and now its 00.07 haha). Where was I? Oh yes "cliché". I'm going to stop writing about it, I'll do it some other time - it's starting to anoy me now.

Well my the upper skin on my toes are blistered. Stupid slippers, went to karate wearing them since I don't get the point of wearing shoes to the dojo anyways. It's Jay C.'s and Kristine Ogtip's Birthday today. Happy Birthday to them! *texts them*

Hmm I just came from the other tab on my other browser window, I don't feel attentive to my blog today. Oh wells.

An 8 year old orange belt taught me katas last time haha such a good teacher. It was funny but nice in a way. You learnt humbleness. Reminds me of that 7 year old who taught me the moves for 'Crank That' last time lol. Well I have to refine every kata, technique and every movement.

Perfectionism?

I guess so... We have to strive to be perfect though we are imperfect. But the idea of trying to be perfect doesn't mean we forget that we are imperfect. Through imperfections we are perfect human beings, because the perfect human being is imperfect.

Reminds me of that Filipino director Joey Reyes, he said something like this: "Imperfections, make you human, and being human makes you beautiful". Not his exact words but to the same power.

Oh well I'll end my ramblings now. What do i do after I post this? Hmmm...

This entry seems to follow the footsteps of Katie's blog, random ramblings of the mind. But it seems to put me at ease somewhat.